GIR Popstar?
by Ababil Ashari
Summary: One shot fic I wrote freestyle...style in 15 minutes and unedited, Gir becomes a popstar! need I say more?


(Gir = Popstar???)  
  
Gir (Doggy mode) walks in the city at day carrying groceries while singing the doom song.  
  
GIR : Doom Doom Doom Doom Doom...  
  
A policeman looks at Gir peculiarly from the safety of his policecar  
  
POLICEMAN : What's this??? A dog walking on two paws, carrying groceries, and singing the best song in the world?!?!?!?! Nothing unusual...LOOK! A DONUT SHOP!!!  
  
And the policecar races off-screen and camera pans to Gir who interuptes the doom song to say...  
  
GIR : Doom Doom Doom Doom...Look at that policeman devour that donut shop!...Doom Doom Doom...  
  
A car that has the words "Poop Records" drives up to Gir but doesn't stop in time hitting the hydrant next to Gir, the door opens revealing a man in a suit with a piece of paper that looks like a contract.  
  
POOP RECORD MAN : I, Poop Record Man am here to give you this record deal FOR SINGING THE ONE SINGLE GREATEST SONG IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE HISTORY OF THE WORLD!!!!!!  
  
GIR : Doooo???(drools) I have a monkeys in my foot (continues to drool)  
  
POOP RECORD MAN : Sign here little doggy.  
  
GIR : (Throws the grocery back in to the air, Gir jumps and eats the whole bag whole in mid-air) Ahhhhhh!!!! (cries uncontrolably than stops to pick up pen and put an X under a line that says "I'll be a slave of Poop Records for 4ever until Poop Record Man says otherwise") Now that I've signed it I'm gonna continue this cry...Ahhhhhhh!!!!!  
  
Then suddenly a van that says "Guys that does Poop Company dirty work" drives up to gir hitting the Hydrant next to the one the car hit and some thugs grab Gir with a sack and takes Gir inside the van that speeds off and hits every car on the road before disappearing to the horizon.   
  
Cut to some sort of record studio with only one mic and a producer can be seen outside the booth Gir is in. The Producer seams to be screaming on the top of his head but is muted since the booth is soundproof then he stops and presses a button  
  
PRODUCER : Sorry, I forgot to press this...talking to the other side button thingy. Now what I was screaming was SING!!!! SING LITTLE DOOOOOOGGY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!! (Rips some of his hair)  
  
Gir looks at the booth in an odd way, sceams, jumps around, destroys the booth, and runs to the mic, stops screaming, and sings the Doom song, and a tape records it.  
  
Cut to Zim's base, Zim is currently testing a human subject with a happiness probe in his head.  
  
ZIM : Now, for the final test of this happiness probe and I'm one step closer to TAKE OVER THIS BALL OF FILTH THAT IS CURSED WITH DOOM THAT WILL BE BROUGHT ON BY ME...ZIM!!! I AM ZIM, I AM ZIM, HAHAHAHAH!!!!!! Hey, where's Gir? Ah whatever. Doo dee doo...  
  
Cut to the record company building located in the center of the city from the ground the top disappears into the red sky, there is a hole in the back of the building that literally coughs us up CDs to the box below the hole and when it's finished filling up one box a worker loads it into the truck, a close up of the box reveals that the CDs were copies of "The Freakish Little Doggy sings The Doom Song", we can see the truck filled up with the boxes and closed up, the truck drives off to the record store, where a whole bunch of fans crowd the entrance and they actually throw their money inside the store and get hit in the head by a "Doom Song" CD in return, the camera follows a customer that has a dent in his head because of the "CD impact", while walking home (presumably) he puts the CD in his walkman, throws away the case, puts on his headphones, and starts twiching, falls down, and has seizures  
  
CUSTOMER : This is the best song in the entire history of the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Poop Record Man looks over the poor customer and says...  
  
POOP RECORD MAN : I know, son, I know.  
  
The camera pans to the sky and time fast forward showing the day progressing day to night and then day again and after that the camera pans to the sidewalk again and a paperboy throws a copy of the "Weekly Billyboard Bulletin", the headline reads "The little doggy hits number 1!" below theres a picture of Gir in the doogy suit drooling so bad the drool makes a puddle on the ground that Gir is standing in.  
  
Cut to a video request show set and the guest VJ Moofy (from the "Girl who cried gnome" episode) says...  
  
MOOFY : And that was "Buy this album please" by The Dudu Heads at number 2. Now buy some GIRL SCOUT COOKIES NOW!!!! after you do that enjoy this next song it's called "The Doom Song" by The Freakish Little Doggy. Wooooooooooooooooo!!!!  
  
Cut to Gir's video who just has Gir in a parking lot.  
  
GIR : When do I sing??? (becomes insane) HHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUUUHUHUHUHU???  
  
DIRECTOR : Now, doggy, now.  
  
GIR : Ok, Doom doom doom doom doom...  
  
The words 1 hour later appear in sync with a time lapse and Gir still continues singing  
  
GIR : Doom doom doom doom doom, I'm Done!  
  
The camera zooms out revealing that Dib and Gaz have been watching the video at home.  
  
DIB :That...(twiches)...That was stupid.  
  
GAZ : (Playing her Game Slave 2) That was almost as stupid as your voice.  
  
DIB : Hey!...How would you know? You didn't even watch it!  
  
GAZ : I know...(grim) I know....  
  
The camera zooms in at the TV and zooms out again revealing Zim was also watching the video at his base  
  
ZIM : Giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What have you doooooooooneee!!!!!!!!!!!! Whyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! You'll blow our cover!!!!! Why am I talking to my self???  
  
Zim puts on the discuise and gets the Voot Crusier and rushes out of the house.  
  
Cut to 1 year later a mansion that is filled with "Suck Munky" bottles, the walls are filled with multi-platinum plaques, some of them are readable one of the says "The Doom Song 17x platinum" next to it is "The Doom Song (rap mix) 15x Platinum" the camera pans to each and every plaque to the right but with each and every plaque the number of sells decreases (Some samples...(macarena mix), (rock mix), (atmospheric mix), and (just wanting to rake in more cash mix)) and finally shows the last plaque "The Doom Song (weird mariachi mix) -2x Platinum" and Gir is sitting in a throne room listening to the rap mix of the Doom Song which is just Gir singing on top of the horrible turntables Gir is currently serviced hand and foot by a team of servants.  
  
GIR : I wanna monkey at the top of my head!!!  
  
A servant runs off and on screen and puts a monkey on top of Gir's head  
  
GIR : I want this room fiiiiiiiiiled with tacos!!!  
  
A truck crashes into the throne room and unloads a truck load of tacos doesnt fill the massive room so Gir throws a tantrum  
  
GIR : More tacooooooooooooooooooooooooooooos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
SERVANTS : Yes, sir!  
  
They leave the room and Poop Record Man enters the room.  
  
POOP RECORD MAN : Have you been paying attention to the record sales little doggy? It's Horrible!!! We are actually paying customers to buy your records!!!  
  
GIR : I have a monkey on top of my head! Monkey! Attack!!!  
  
The monkey attacks Poop Record Man and he screams uncontolably  
  
POOP RECORD MAN (off-screen) : Ahhhhh!!!! You are FIRED!!! You'll never work in this town again! AHHHH! My arm!!!  
  
GIR : Bye, Bye Monkey!   
  
Gir walks out of the throne room takes off his doggy suit and flies though the ceiling and is hit by the Voot Cruiser  
  
ZIM (exhausted) : Finally there you are!!!   
  
Zim activates tractor beam and beams Gir up.   
  
ZIM : Where have you been? I've searched for you all year!!! Why did I do that??? I could have taken over the world by now if not for this execive...finding you thing!!!  
  
COMPUTER : But your happiness probe plan only had a 0.0001% probability of succeding anyway  
  
ZIM : Silence! I AM ZIM!!   
  
GIR (insanely) : I had 23 servants serving me  
  
ZIM : You too, Gir. Silence!!!!   
  
The Voot cruiser speeds of into the horizon   
  
GIR (v.o) : I'm gonna sing the doom song and splode myself! doom doom doom doom...(continues to end)  
  
ZIM (v.o) : Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! Stop Gir! Stop that song!! Ahhhhh!  
  
The voot cruiser is seen like a flying uncontolably like a drunk driver is driving  
  
THE END??? 


End file.
